it was the end of the world again only this time with alien-like dinosaurs, all grey and about 4 foot tall, with teeth like velociraptors, and a couple of them were giant T-rex sized. we were in the safe place - the place in the film where you know "they could not possibly kill us here" and i know they're coming so we drive out as the t-rex one eats the movie theater. as we leave we pass my parents' house and i suddenly realise that we have to stop and go look for them, even though i know that they are dead, but i have to know and i have to see them dead so we go back but get distracted by a woman who i think has dogs.

some of it was in turkey.

crossing the carpark on my own to get to the factory and dad tells me not to cross the parking lot on my own. i ask him why and he says "because it's forbidden."

i had to go to london to post something, so i flew into heathrow, went to the post office and then tried to find my way back to the boarding gate. then i realised that actually bil's house in somerville was on the opposite side of the thames to the houses of parliament, and it was snowing, so i didn't need to fly anywhere. i thought i'd go and see my parents, but they weren't in woodbury any more so i hitched a ride with some random guy into topsham, and read my book on the way. i realised i was being rude and so looked up and pointed out some monkeys that were "oohing" and "aahing" on the roadside. one of them jumped at his window and he got a little scared.

cycling through london bump into robin who shows me leaflet of aberdeen fishing thing. he said he didn't care very much for perthshire. the queen is talking at a parade but i don't want to get stuck in the crowds so i try to cycle through a sidestreet instead.

then we're all being lifted off for some conference. jess is wearing a grey suit with a blue stripey shirt, trying to persuade me to only take t-shirts. i've lost my bag though, so i don't have anything. even though we're only going to oxford, the company wants to fly us. we all agree this is ridiculous.

and also there's one guy who's laying bear traps to try and get me. so i walk around and annoy him by missing them. i have to go to get something white so that i can play chess (the white piece is missing) and also get into the restaurant and the big round table you're allowed to smoke at.

then someone takes us for a walk along the canal and all the kids dive in and go swimming but we see all these upturned hands everywhere which mean we shouldn't go in. there are dead things in the water i think but the water is dark and clean and it feels like bradford upon avon. my feet are muddy and i go and change the kitchen roll holder for jess who's having some troubles in the kitchen.

i'm sailing and we set out to win the world. we capsize halfway through the race. i forget the rest.

sailing with dad in a loch at the very top of scotland. it's a barren wasteland and there are dead babies everywhere. the boats are getting bigger. there are abandoned castles on the hills surrounding the lake.

we kidnap some children, only it starts off by watching the fairy queen kidnap juliette binoche who is getting younger and is very happy about it. she's going to start it on two idiots.

we all prance around the house in a musical comedy while the kidnapped kids stay inside and outside in grandma's garden a father and son are moaning that they don't get to play enough together, not enough to make his feet hurt: "and my feet don't hurt" he sings, "no his feet don't hurt" his son sings. so we make them play together a lot more until: "Man, do my feet hurt" sings the father, "Yeah, do his feet hurt" sings the son.

this musical gets really tedious and the finale is a song that everyone sings: "we're not quite the same as before / but we're still not happy"

after everyone leaves i stack up the dishwasher with a psycho killer woman. she has lots of glasses but hasn't noticed a space so i say "there's room for one glass there". she looks at me like she's going to fucking kill me then and there. "fine" i think, and after she's done and has left, i reopen the dishwasher to remove my hairbrush that she put in there too.

on the moon. we're all wearing black leather - the girls have black leather length netball skirts with zippers on the side. i watch my boss go round to people with a visa card - once he inserts the card, that person loses their personality and becomes a drone. i'm scared about this, but as i run down the tunnels to try and tell the superhero, mars crashes into us.

or rather, it spontaneously disintegrates about 4 foot above everyone's heads and we all get covered in mars dust. but, you only get covered if you look at it. and i was too scared to look it straight in the face, so my boss tries to get me to watch it on action replay in an IMAX but i sneak away before it comes too close as i don't want to get covered in mars dust. i'm thinking something day of the triffids-esque.

i run away further to try and organise an underground but no one's interested. they all have credit cards.

everything started with the letter A

it started with a kid showing me a green and blue wax crayon drawing it had done, thinking i was its mother. i forget the middle bit, so i'll skip to the end: i killed a man with one shot to the chest, and i don't think that self-defence was my reasoning. a group of us were arrested, but i was going to get put on trial for murder. i escaped from jail with some guy, but then the police told my friends that they'd all get tried for murder if i wasn't there. so i went back and told the police to take me in so my friend could go. i was somewhere like texas, and i knew that i was guilty, and that they were going to execute me.

the trial was the very next day, in the T-station, and i was leant forward over the witness box like a kid and i made a terrible impression on the judge, who realised i was a stammering, nervous, idiotic wreck who was clearly guilty of first degree murder.

i went back to my cell, in the pub, and everyone had figured out that they weren't on death row any more and they were all glad, but unhappy for me. i had to await my sentencing, which would happen the next day, and i went to sleep knowing i would be killed in the morning.

then the next day i went back before the judge and she smiled and laughed at me - "you didn't really think you'd be put to death did you? you've got blonde hair, and you're a girl, and you're white! we'll never put you to death!" i smile and sit down in the T-station and start to cry.

zombies. coming into the house. two girls. they seem quite nice. they just want somewhere to sleep. but i know that really they just want to eat our flesh. why doesn't anyone else realise? they are confused by the zombies' kindness. so i repeatedly punch the one with blonde hair in the face to kill her, fogetting that of course you can't kill a zombie just by punching it in the face - i end up tying a towel around her head and punching her through that as i don't like her looking at me. but my arm is weak and in the end a boy has to finish her off for me. i forget what happened to the other one.

*wake up - go to bathroom - have glass of water*

it's an alternative ending to 28 days later and i'm being played by meryl streep. all the rage-infected people are dead, and we go to Christopher Eccleston's manor house to celebrate. there are lots of people in wheelchairs and i'm relieved when no one asks me to wear a special dress. i see blood on the floor though and i know that the rage-infected people are coming. we get back on the bus. we drive out through greece and someone cuts us up and suddenly we're out of the set and the film's over.

the kid from donnie darko (watched pleasantville last night) is nailing me and mary to crosses and i'm calling 911 screaming into the phone as he grabs my ankle, drags me accross the shiny kitchen floor and hammers a nail right through the bones into the wood. somehow we talk him down and he rips the nails out and lets us off. so then i turn back time and he doesn't hurt us and everything's fixed.

then we're in a big house somewhere but i'm not sure where and i can't remember anything. something about wolves, perhaps, or a big dog?

(by the way, mary is a character from this long poem i've been working on for the past 6 months or so that i finished yesterday. i didn't really know what she would look like, but she was in my dream with me. that makes me happy. although the fact that we were both being crucified is somewhat disturbing, for a variety of different reasons.)

meeting john in a coffeeshop but it's raining and he arrives via the back and i see him through the window shake himself like a dog to get the water off his back.

what the fuck were we talking about?

can't remember how i ditched my parents but there were these lions roaming loose around the hotel complex. i had a towel round my waist and faced the wall of the building. it sort of ignored me but i knew it was just waiting for me to move before it pounced. i made a run for the big glass doors of the hotel and managed to get inside and the lion slammed into the door. i called the two security guards who were cretins from east anglia and they somehow managed to let the lion into the hotel. it ran straight into two tourists and ate their golden labrador. some old guy, jane horrocks and i scramble and manage to get into this glass lift, but then i fall out of it halfway up the building and have to cling on til we get to the top floor - it wasn't glass it was no just walls. we don't know which floor the lion is on now and i realise a lift is a really stupid idea because if the doors open and the lion's right there, we won't be able to shut the doors in time before it pounces.

the cow in the cage was tremendously important and symbolic for some reason. we were all trying to get it out. john was getting in a fight with these japanese kids who were throwing basketballs at his face. other people were in the house. we're on Mass Ave in a different dimension and my boss pops up to say "the promises of a million children, sold to another world" before vanishing.

very strange things

what do you get if you cross akira with eastenders? a lot of japanese people on motorbikes with cockney accents getting killed. and ooh the baby with the big head. then i dreamt that boston was actually in aberdeenshire, and so it wasn't really very far away at all...

end of the world - nazis coming onto the island. mum dad and i rush to set the dynamite in the cake shop. we get it in but i think we're going to die anyway.

scott took me swimming around a fictional island where there was a beautiful sunken temple that magnetically attracts fish. i said i wanted to scuba dive so we were going to buy then i had to meet my dad in a basement bar. the water in the sea was so warm and clear, and the sand was perfect white.

okay here it is, from the other night:

flight in plane bus over city of boston just hang on - all the boats on the water it's in the summer - then go over an invisible rollercoaster, tracing it from above. i have really bad vertigo. we get dropped onto other side. i can't go back up. i find a staircase. "i'll be fine, but i don't know where we're staying or how to get there" then superman is there. he walks down the stairs (but with yellow boots, not red) and he picks me up. i put my arms up around his neck and give him a kiss on the cheek. "i thought it was about time" he says and i realise that i'm clark kent.

so he flies me to this carpark, drops me off, in the middle of a massive fight. everyone has baseball bats - people of all ages. everyone eventually pauses, scared. i say "here's what you do, you go around twatting everything until you don't feel like hitting anymore." and they all stop. then for some reason we watch a biology class of girls watching guinea pigs mating in a model city. i wake up just as one of the guinea pigs jumps onto my face.

dammit i forgot to bring my notebook to work.

last night all i remember is being sarcastic at the girls i work with when one of them said "why would you be hungover?", but on SATURDAY night i had a dream about SUPERMAN! he came and flew me away and i kissed him on the cheek. it was WONDERFUL. more of that when i get home and find my notebook.

dammit.